


beautiful lie

by ryukita



Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Drabble, M/M, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-12
Updated: 2018-02-12
Packaged: 2019-03-17 09:20:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13656060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ryukita/pseuds/ryukita
Summary: it's always been a game to you, hasn't it?





	beautiful lie

**Author's Note:**

> i love suffering and venting

Saihara didn't know why he did this to himself. He wants to tell himself that he's a fool, that his feelings are absolutely irrelevant and he needs to crush them, that he shouldn't hope.

Hope, Saihara has found, is a concept that can bring immense despair. He wonders why he lets it lead him further down the rabbit hole, with any chance of escape becoming slimmer the more he follows that hope.

He wishes he could stop his heart from jumping when he heard the word "beloved" leave those lips. The voice haunts his dreams, lurks in the corner of his every thought. It makes his ears ring and his mind go blank.

Of course, only when it comes from /him/, with his terribly pretty lips curved into that same, burning smile. It sears Saihara, knowing that all it could hide is a parade of lies.

"Beloved" could never be the truth, no matter how much he wished to grasp it.

It doesn't help that the very subject of his torment seemed to effortlessly attract every aspect of his attention. How every expression looks gorgeous on his features, how he knows all the right words to stir every emotion in Saihara, how annoyingly intriguing he is.

Saihara wants to find out the truth behind every lie that leaves that mouth. Perhaps that's what first pushed him into this spiral of feelings he wished to banish.

It comes to a boiling point when the two are together after school, and Ouma seems to be sitting closer to him than usual. Saihara knows he can't bring himself to look away from those alluring eyes, sucking him in with every second he dared to get lost in them.

"Do you like me, Saihara-chan?"

The question is like a searing knife to his heart, and his lungs feel as though they are collapsing in on themselves. Everything he's ever felt is clawing at his throat, desperate for release, dying to be freed from suppression.

That doesn't stop Saihara from taking in that expression on Ouma's face. His lips are curled into a devious smirk, and his eyes gleam as if he's caught the detective doing something he shouldn't be.

He's right, anyway.

It hits Saihara that this is a game to Ouma. He knows he's intelligent behind that wall of lies, so every word, every brush of their hands, every smile...

It's always been a false hope.

Saihara saw this coming, but it doesn't stop the tirade of his emotions. He can't let it go, not here, not in front of him.

He silently stands up, averting his gaze. He doesn't see Ouma's face falter just a bit.

"Saihara-chan?"

The way he says his name will surely appear in his dreams tonight, but he needs out. This burns his wrists, his heart; every part of him seems to scream in pain.

When he runs out, Saihara barely notices the tears running down his face. How can he help it? Having his emotions overwhelm him is a rarity, and heartache is something he's never dealt with to this degree.

How has he fallen so hard?

It isn't until he slams the door to his room shut behind him and he slides to the floor that he realizes that love and hope could never mix.

Not for him.

**Author's Note:**

> find me on twitter @nozotome!


End file.
